We dont struggle. Ep 1: Odomtology Definition and Meaning - Why do some people need AA and others don't? Spread the influence of these impactful messages by sharing them on popular social media platforms such Al Anon is like a laboratory, we experiment and find out what works for us. How do I practice acceptance when I wish things were different? In my early days in the program I thought acceptance was a kind of giving up; an admission of weakness or helplessness. When I admitted that there were people, places, things, and situations over which I was totally powerless, those things began to lose their power over me. We were depressed and complained we felt bad, when in fact we were mainly asking for sympathy and attention. Alcoholics anonymous Fourth Edition. The steps say WE, Al-Anon is program that is meant to be worked with another and with God. Today while I was doing my daily prayer and meditation, I suddenly felt I could accept where I am in my life right now. Think. As God's people we stand on our feet; we don't crawl before anyone., If we were to live, we had to be free of anger., I simply had to believe in a Spirit of the Universe, who knew neither time nor limitation., To be vital, faith must be accompanied by self sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action., It is very difficult for me to come to terms with my spiritual illness because of my great pride, disguised by my material successes and my intellectual power. Honest. It didn't work., Selfishness, self-centeredness! <> My journey to acceptance started when I attended my first meeting that gave me hope. SLOGANS & other quotes/acronyms . These people became my Al-Anon friends, and in time, some of my closestRead more , Prayer and Meditation helps me to find acceptance by surrendering my will and focusing on HPs will. ", "The mind is like a parachute, it works best when open. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); document.getElementById( "ak_js_2" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. I love the slogans and find them very useful. That resonated with me. These I have to leave with my Higher Power to solve (or not). Detachment, Not Amputation. Its time to go back to Step One and admit Im powerless. AA Speaker Acceptance is the Answer, Matt H. AA Speaker Recovery, my new and wonderful life, Jerry J. Steps 6 & 7: My spiritual health is excellent when I realize that the better I get, the more I discover how much help I need from others., We cannot subscribe to the belief that this life is a vale of tears, though it once was just that for many of us. EGO: 6 0 obj made me feel better today :), Some of these May be repeats but I found some more Thoughtful. ~ First Things First ~ Live And Let Live ~, ~ One Day At A Time ~ Let Go And Let God ~ But For The Grace Of God, there go I ~ Think! Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. I remove the other persons dignity if I try to make their decisions for them ODAT pg 200 In this same study, having a positive attitude also strongly influenced disease acceptance. I won't." In a few short years I lost my marriage, my beautiful Mom (my alcoholic), and several pets. This short passage about acceptance may be one of the most quoted passages in recovery literature. Even. The acceptance, and the power of God, kept me going through all of this. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. I learned to identify with these Al-Anon people and all l had to do was listen. What it does mean is I am powerless to do anything about it and I have to accept that fact. HALT: The energy that would have been dumped into worry, tears, and obsession can be turned into positive action. Discover an assortment of the most cherished and inspiring quotes related to Acceptance Al Anon. LOVE: AlAnon does not offer counseling or advice. Acceptance of not only alcoholism, but acceptance of how much I needed help. It protects us until we are equipped to cope with reality. I remember it so vividly, it looked like she was having a heart attack, because it was forty five years to that day I had watched my dad die of a heart attack. Be in nature and discover how much God loves you, Pause, so you can hear the rabbits. I asked how could I make amends for my poor behaviour in our marriage so far. ", "Thank You God for reminding me not to interfere with Your Divine Plan. For over 20 years Dr. Umhau was a senior clinical investigator at theNational Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholismof the National Institutes of Health (NIH). Listen and Learn 9. But for the Grace of God 7. When I feel I've bottomed out Al-Anon is where we can practice kindness to ourselves. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives. Surrender Take Evolve The thinking/behaviour no longer serves your best interests. Through the gift of Al-Anon I have turned my life around. Just for Today 14. How Important Is It? Just For Today, 2023 Dotdash Media, Inc. All rights reserved. I cant believe Im still here after all thats changed in my life, but I am and thats due to my HP and Al-Anon. You Can Change Yourself, You Can Cure Yourself 3 A's ~ Awareness, Acceptance, Action . Clancy I. Moderators reserve the right to not publish comments that do not adhere to AlAnon's Traditions and spiritual principles, such as comments that may draw AlAnon into controversy. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. Take what you liked and leave the rest. On the flip side, emotional non-acceptance of alcoholism, as supported by denial, guilt, fighting against, or escaping the illness, puts a person at a high risk of relapse, even if a person can rationally accept the disease. Toxic shame = the feeling that I am a mistake instead of feeling that I made a mistake. Martin Luther I am blaming someone else for something I need to do. We are all in for the 4 A's: "Anxiety, Awareness, Acceptance, Action". Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. For a few months my wife and I kept it in a separate account so as not to touch it in case there was a mistake in my determination and my understanding in the way I had answered the required questions. I had to accept all of these things and they were things I thought I could never live through if they happened. It's from the 4th edition of Alcoholics Anonymousor The Big Book as it is widely known. I ask God each day to help me accept life on life's terms and give me the grace and dignity to get through it. I was thinking earlier today about the housing situation my husband and I are in. Step 7 Humbly ask (acknowledge who I am in relation to God) Tradition One and "Principles above Personalities" helps me accept people. The only person who can love me the way I want to be loved is me. John C. Umhau, MD, MPH, CPE is board-certified in addiction medicine and preventative medicine. I can only control myself and my own reactions. To erase it, ask God to remove your shortcomings. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. Keep an Open Mind 4. Others Everything. Your first step should be to talk with your primary care doctor. Would I rather be Right or would I rather be HAPPY. My sister is sixteen years older than me and she was like a mother to me, someone that I could always count on. When I complain about me or about you, am complaining about God's handiwork. A mind is a dangerous place, dont go there alone. What a gift! Then I guess the more I feel accepted within myself, the more able I will be able to accept others as they are. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation "some fact of my life" unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment., I have come to believe that hard times are not just meaningless suffering and that something good might turn up at any moment. Al-Anon is designed to help spouses, parents, siblings, and other family members, while Alateen is geared specifically toward younger people living with an alcoholic. All I can work on isRead more , Practicing acceptance when I wished things were different was impossible for me before the program. Courage to Change Page 153 Helping Im disrespecting their ability to do it themselves. Yet I am still a newcomer in a way, I feel. We seek to make our Higher Power a constant companion, turning to the God of our understanding for guidance and spiritual nourishment throughout the day and night., We actively pursue this goal when we say a prayer before answering the phone or take a moment to listen for that still small voice inside us before making a decision, even a minor decision. Makes me really wonder what acceptance means to me today. Troy S. NA Speaker Escaping from the Prison of Addiction, David H. Big Book Study To Employers Week 28 (Page 144 to Page 150), David H. Big Book Study To Employers Week 27 (Page 136 to Page 144), David H. Big Book Study To Wives Week 26 (Page 124 to Page 136), David H. Big Book Study To Wives Week 25 (Page 109 to Page 124). Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. Executive Committee for Real Property Management (ECRPM). Tired Keep Coming Back 6. Hard but humbling. When I wake up today, there are lots of possibilities. Steps 10-12 maintain it Acceptance that I am not alone in my feelings and experiences with the alcoholic. AA Speaker How to find freedom and happiness in recovery, Earl H. AA Speaker How to achieve freedom with the 12 Steps. Acronyms: Accepting what I cannot change, and Letting Go and Letting God, gives me immense freedom, and liberates me from the discomfort I begin to feel when dealing with a difficult situation. I try to keep my boundaries high, my expectations low, and my heart open. Even though my little human mind cannot figure out what the outcome will be, I am confident that whatever comes will be for my ultimate good. Alanon's Three C's: Alcoholism: You didn't CAUSE it, You can't CONTROL it, and You can't CURE it! Say what you mean but don't say it meanly. Best of all, I have come to accept myself and love myself with all my flaws. Without these early tools, I may not have understood the footwork I would need to pursue. These steps have grown and I expand with the steps. Unless we have first judged and condemned them for what they did, there would be no reason for us to forgive them. What it does mean is you are admitting your powerlessness and limitations you are letting go, so you can then begin to recover and heal. We must back up our prayers with action., In attempting to protect ourselves, we let our personalities slip away until we were emotionally numb. But For The Grace Of God. Be the first to learn about new releases! We feature speakers from Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Overeaters Anonymous, Al-Anon Family Groups. This is what I think. Personally Denise Dianaty for you to relish and distribute. Kind. It has been a while now. 5 0 obj Goodreads helps you follow your favorite authors. "And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I was new in the program, the meeting I attended included a brief word about sponsorship within the opening to the meeting. Courage to Change Page 153 Any time I am in resentment, I am not taking care of myself. As far as acceptance, it took a veryRead more . Odomtologys note: Acceptance is one of those themes that comes up time and time again in the recovery process. Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 1600 Corporate Landing Parkway. We walked six blocks away where there was a hospital that had just recently opened. I will Let It Begin with Me Next thing I know I am driving along and she starts struggling. I can Keep An Open Mind Progress Not Perfection 5. See more ideas about al anon, words, inspirational quotes. Northern California World Service Area of AFG, Inc. www.ncwsa.org. Living in the past is VICTIM, Living in the future is MANIPULATING. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. Al-Anon and Alateen are two programs that are part of a worldwide fellowship which offers support to families of alcoholics. Be yourself because everyone else is taken. Oscar Wilde I ask God each day to help me accept life on lifes terms and give me the grace and dignity to get through it. In some of the hardest times of my life, there was no active alcoholism going on in my home. An Expectation is A Resentment Waiting to Happen. This takes honesty, courage, humility and faith and gets easier over time. Jun 19, 2017 - Explore Marie Smith's board "Al Anon" on Pinterest. Definitions: Take what you like & leave the rest. Unless we have first judged and condemned them for what they did, there would be no reason for us to forgive them. I cannot give what I do not have. featuring works from 90 notable authors including Self,Eckhart Tolle,Sri Sri Ravi Shankar,Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj,D. When we point a finger at someone, three are pointing back at us. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow. Tradition One and Principles above Personalities helps me accept people. Acceptance for me has always been a problem. There are multiple layers and many different areas it can be applied. I have His help and guidance to weather the storms and enjoy the beauty I had not seen before., We are powerless over anothers alcoholism. How do you apply this years Conference theme, Love, Laugh, and Grow Together, to your own recovery? This phrase helped me accept him and focus on myself. ), Father Tom W. We can BE the CHANGE Family Recovery Speaker, Paul O. Check out our 12-Step Store with T-shirts, coffee mugs, books and more! (2022). Live in the present. What you think of me is none of my business. Nothing exists in a vacuum therefore if you remove something you need to put something else in it's place. It is a sign of spiritual health to be able to ask God every day to enlighten me, to recognize His will, and to have the strength to execute it. I found that help in AlAnon and I shall be forever grateful that AlAnon was there. Both the Al-Anon literature and the Alcoholics Anonymous literature place a big importance on being able to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Al-Anon knows the struggles of people that may feel despair, hopelessness and other feelings that may result in a feeling that things will never change. Step 3. I will add yours. Bring The Body and The Mind Will Follow. <> Moderators may edit comments according to AlAnon Policy to remove personally identifiable information to protect anonymity, as well as remove derogatory language or statements that are inflammatory or unrelated. Alanon Quotes Al Anon 12 Steps Recovery Al-Anon teaches us how to stay sane when things are insane. Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecoveryshow.com with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Steps 4-9 bring recovery.. 3 C's ~ You Can Control Yourself, You Can Change Yourself, You Can Cure Yourself. 7 0 obj Easy Does It 3. Please share your experiences by commenting on the topic below. Dealing With Rejection Do you have difficulty handling rejection in any form? I was so upset it was the middle of a 3 hour meeting and I didnt know quite what to do. You may have come to Al-Anon never once thinking you were powerless, that there was something you could do to cause the alcoholic to wake up and finally admit there was a problem. I finished my short presentation and put myself on mute. I am not responsible for other peoples happiness. And isn't it kind of Funny Our website is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. When I cant find a solution to a problem, when I have nagging doubts, fears, or frustrations, when I feel lost or confused, a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself can make a tremendous difference. and place First Things First I repeat it over and over focusing on changing myself and accepting what I cant change-other people, places, and things. Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. It doesnt mean Im weak, it means I can acknowledge that I need help and that asking for help is ok. Seeking my higher power during these times is how I can practice acceptance. This is what I feel. - I am pretty sure, You can - Cause, How - important is it? I try to remember that when I see a loved one experiencing their ups and downs, I must resist the urge to grab on and try to control their ride, or go along on the ride with them. It helped me see how critical I was of my alcoholic and how my criticism was an attempt to change him. Be the first to learn about new releases! What I noticed this morning is that, while I have a stuck feeling, I feel calm and even content with the situation when Im focused on my own spiritual growth. We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. If you are looking in the past or the future, you're not living in the now. Share your experience visiting other groups within the Al-Anon worldwide fellowship. Listen And Learn ~, Keep An Open Mind ~ Let It Begin With Me ~ Together We Can Make It ~ Be Honest ~ Keep Coming Back ~, Feel Good About Saying "No" ~ Fake It 'Till You Make It! It still brings tears to my eyes. She did remember two things, myself and J.D. The Serenity Prayer is the best tool for me. The final time I typed it went like this: Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, I cant change whoRead more . Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. www.phonemeetings.org Learning daily to spot, admit, and correct these flaws is the essence of character-building and good living. All suffering is the result of thought pointing in the wrong direction. It is futile to spend time trying to figure out what makes some one else tick. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); document.getElementById( "ak_js_2" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. If you keep doing what you've always done, you will keep getting what you've always gotten. I can only love myself as much as I believe I am lovable. For me, acceptance came when I finally realized that I was dealing with a disease. Step 1 is admitting you are powerless over alcohol. I know I am powerless over alcoholism and that has empowered me. The Serenity Prayer helps me find acceptance. Otherwise, we risk seriously diminishing our credibility and diminishing our own self-esteem., Wed love your help. Have I must focus on myself and my recovery; finding the courage to change the things I can. Subst Abuse Rehabil. By Rick, California, We have a right to expect more from life than mere survival., I had invited God to come into my life but I had no idea how I thought things should be or how often I would close the door to God and let my will run wild. On the Steps: So I got back to Step 1 and realize with certainty that I am powerless over alcohol and that my life has become unmanageable. I am grateful I no longer have tunnel vision and am open to change. ((n2w]/%{3VKBN [XgBF:Q~YfbhlO7J2EjobX. This is what makes Odomtology 12-Step Recovery Media stand out. Sometimes referred to as "the AA acceptance prayer," the Serenity Prayer is usually recited at the beginning of almost all 12-step group meetings. Well in 1999 my sister was in the car with me as I was driving, and her kidneys shut down. We have compiled the 31 most helpful slogans. I cannot give other people the status of my Higher Power. We personally listen to, and approve of, every single speaker tape we post. Once I surrender, I experience a new beginning, everything just falls into place. Which Al-Anon slogans and acronyms are your favorite? Writing to the God of my own understanding gives me a way to reflect on what Ive read in CAL and heard in meetings. If I repeatedly make similar suggestions or ask prodding questions again and again, I am probably trying to control. The higher the expectations, the lower the serenity. ", "Listen not to criticisms or accolades both take you off your path." I determined today that I am disturbed by a persons presence, and I had been trying not to say it. Easy Does It ~ Keep It Simple ~ How Important Is It? We wish you the best of luck in all you do! Then, after acceptance of your powerlessness, you can move forward with changing what you can (what is within your realm of control). WAIT: Meditation sitting quietly and letting the mud settle ~ "Change your attitude change your life. And learn to Live and Let Live Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Acceptance is the way to freedom. B. Franklin. At other times turning points are endings, such as when I see clearly the need to stop festering resentments or crippling self-seeking. The key to serenity is acceptance. We can only deepen our commitment every time we surrender anew., Vindictiveness, vengeance, resentment, blame, and hard-heartedness do us far more harm than anyone else., As important as it is to set time aside for spiritual exercise, it is even more important to recognize that our spiritual selves require ongoing attention. Understanding the message of the 3 Cs that I didnt cause it, that I cant control it and that I cant cure it, has helped me with acceptance. Let It Begin with Me 13. Learn to give from my overflow rather that from my reserve. Why Two steps to accept the pleasant: surprise & satisfaction.Four steps to accept the unpleasant . Whether we have a child, a spouse, or a loved one of any kind effected by alcoholism, the journey to getting better includes acceptance. I think Im more ready to move than he is. Responsible = I want to be able to respond, not react. Learn to live with the dis-ease that comes when you stop something and practice new behavior, the feelings will pass. Sometimes we try something new and it doesn't work out for us, that's ok too, just try something different. Don't get too: Am I cant control their choices, their perceptions, their decisions, or the consequences of their actions. endobj This simple, loving reminder can prevent our saying or doing things we might regret, and can help us to avoid rash decisions., limits help us to know in advance what our options are and how we feel about them so that, when faced with a stressful situation where we may not be thinking clearly, we will have some idea of what is in our best interest. I cant make anyone elses well-being more important to me than it is to them. Out. Great for everyday life and reassurance, Al-Anon slogans help when one is in need of a little help. On Helping, Fixing and Controlling: In support, Ep 3: Jose and the "Strange" Stranger - Does someone in recovery need to make it their entire life? And Think, How Important Is It I also attended many meetings early in my recovery to listen to the winners and learn about how they worked their Al-Anon program. I dont live with anRead more . Im glad this is the topic for the month. That process leads me to new insights, like the time I realized I couldnt accept a past hurt had happened because I wasnt willing to forgive. When I blame someone else for something, I give up my power to them.
